Wednesday, November 06, 2002

So, you know, I was over at Fox News getting the specific results of the Senate elections and noticed that the Alaskan Independence Party had fielded a candidate. Holy shit, I said to myself, here lo these many years I've been airily brushing off Catalan-nationalistic-minded students' questions about whether there were any regional or state "nationalist" parties similar to those in the Spanish autonomous regions, saying, no, no, of course we don't have any of that in America. Well, I have been very wrong about this, everybody, and I sincerely apologize. I will still defend the thesis that there are no important "nationalist" political parties in America, but that doesn't mean that there aren't any at all.

So, I go to the AKIP website, which, by the way, I had a lot of trouble downloading. Their site boasted that they were the third largest political party in Alaska, which I don't buy because I figure the Republicans are #1, the Democrats are a very distant #2, and the Libertarians are a strong #3, leaving the AKIP #4 at best. I dunno. Maybe the Democrats are really #4. You can never figure Alaskan politics. Anyway, a quick glance through some of their screeds showed that they're in favor of "Accountability", which we suppose we are too; "End(ing) Waste in Government", which it's pretty hard not to go along with; "Equal Use of Fish and Game", where our Catalanist friends will probably jump off the AKIP bandwagon, since it's pretty clear by now that this is an Alaskan white people's party demanding equal access with the Indians, Eskimos, and Aleuts to fishing and hunting stocks (the Catalanists would of course side with the nonwhite natives, not the white invaders); and "Resource Development", which will cause the lefty Catalanists to freak out, since they're often Greenies too, and Resource Development means mines and oil drilling and logging and other ways of developing, or exploiting, Alaska's natural resources. A point in their favor: though they still want to be independent after Sept. 11, they condemn the terrorist attacks and express their sympathy for the victims.

So I think, wonder if Hawaii has one? Shore nuf, they have at least two. One of them, called Hawai'i Independent and Sovereign, uses very Catalanist-style rhetoric when it says that one of its missions is to "protect our rights and way of life under the occupation system." I think that means, "We'll bitch about being oppressed but are thrilled to grab government subsidies and pork for Hawaiian-folklore projects." Not too many Catalanists would go along with one of their other planks, though, the one that wants to bring back the Hawaiian monarchy. They tend to be rather republican in sentiment, though a few of the older, more romantic, very traditional, Catholic Catalanists (like Mr. X, a well-known gentleman who we are not identifying because we're not sure he's officially out of the closet but who is known for his medievalist proclivities; he's both gay and ultra-Catholic, and is best known for his expertise in heraldry. He'd just love a restoration of the old Crown of Aragon monarchy, or even better the Counts of Barcelona. He'd get all busy drawing up new coats of arms and stuff) probably would like an independent Catalan kingdom or county or whatever.

So then I go back to the Google page and see this web page dedicated to minor American political parties. It turns out that not only do Alaska and Hawaii have pro-independence parties (along with Puerto Rico, of course) but so do Alabama, California, Connecticut, Florida, Illinois, Iowa, Minnesota, Montana, New York, New Jersey, North Carolina, Tennessee, and Vermont. The Vermont guys call themselves the Green Mountain Boys, of course. We're rather afraid to check out the Alabama independence party website, as we can't help but think that very few black people are members. As for the New Jersey independence party, I say more power to them!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Well, I am an Alabamian - and you don't know a THING about us. At least nothing beyond the media stereotyping you've swallowed. You honestly think that ALABAMA was somehow the epicenter of the Civil Rights movement? Boy, you'd better get your facts straight. There were also skirmishes and problems, MAJOR ones that included violence against blacks, in cities outside our region. Not just outside our STATE, but outside our REGION. Here in Birmingham, as well as across Alabama, we work with blacks, we eat with blacks, we go to movies with blacks, we drink from the same fountains as blacks. Where racism does exist in Alabama, it goes BOTH WAYS (kind of the way it works in every other state of the do know that racism is not a Southern problem, right Einstein?). Yes, I know the thought of a black person having a racist streak is probably hard for someone like you to process. If there are few blacks in the Alabama Independence Party (I wouldn't know, I am not a member), its not because they aren't welcome, you arrogant jackass. Its because black people in our state are not tremendously informed, politically speaking. They do not mobilize around political issues (except in the case of black candidates, local and national). I enjoyed your piece until you decided to take the quite UNPROVOKED swing at our state. Sounds to me kind of like you might be a bit racist yourself, making such assumptions. Wouldn't you be chagrined if the AIP had a sizable number of blacks, thus making YOU the racist by saying such a thing? Of course, I realize you're statement was directed at white's, but you need to know what its like to be presumed upon and have to defend yourself against the perception that your every word carries some kind of racial undercurrent. You might not be a racist, but you are most certainly an elitist idiot.