Anecdote: the Vanguardia reporter on the way to Bush's ranch saw what she thought was the "first and only antiwar demonstrator in Texas" holding up a hand-lettered sign. Nope. It was a high school kid advertising a bake sale. Anyway, Aznar and Bush were all, like, friendly and stuff. Bush treated José María to a few hugs and pats on the back and the editorial page says, you know, maybe it's not a bad idea for Spain to be friendly to America.

Tony Blair went to Rome, where he had a very nice audience with the Pope and then met with the people running the Vatican, Secretary of State Angelo Sodano and "Foreign Affairs minister" Jean-Louis Taurin. They told him that going to war with Saddam would be inhumanitarian because it would just make the situation "caused by the embargo" worse. I figure that if we can take out Saddam and his regime fairly cleanly and bloodlessly, which I think we can do, Iraq will instantly be flooded with humanitarian aid from all sides and the embargo will instantly stopped. Then the Iraqis can sell their oil and, like, invest the profits in fixing the country instead of building massive palaces and nasty weapons for a murderous thug. The Vangua is floating the rumor that Blair plans to convert to Catholicism after his mandate as P.M. is over

Comparing Saddam to Hitler is not fair. Hitler was much weirder. Saddam is a good old Timur or Genghis Khan-style Central Asian tribal gangster, and he's got a certain amount of Stalin in him as well. Do not expect this guy to go gently into that good night.

The Vangua's weekly alleged humor section today features a cartoon genealogy of President Bush; he's descended from one "Monkey Fitzgerald Bush", whose daughter "Lucy" mated with a donkey and gave rise to the Bush family we know. It's interesting how we tend to portray those we despise as subhuman. Der Stürmer used to do that a lot.

Things are getting unpleasant in the Basque Country. The closed-down newspaper accused of being an ETA front, "Egunkaria", is pulling the same stunt these people always pull when declared illegal; they've changed the name to "Egunero" and it's business as usual. They got about 50,000 ETA sympathizers out on the streets of San Sebastián to demonstrate against government repression; these people are from the ETA front party Herri Batasuna, the Basque nationalist party PNV, and the Communists. Cataloonies Esquerra Republicana are backing Egunwhatever, as is the Cataloony wing of Convergence and Union. International imbecile José Bové showed up at the demo in Bilbao. The Socialists are supporting the PP government for now. The PP have offered to combine with the Socialists and run a joint anti-ETA candidacy in the next Basque elections. The Socialists are saying no so far. Wait till ETA knocks a few more of them off--or don't they remember ex-Socialist minister, Ernest Lluch, a naive pro-dialogue appeaser peacenik, a "useful idiot" if there ever was one (don't get us wrong, he was a good and decent man, but not the brightest), whom ETA shot in the head right here in Barcelona? Or any more of ETA's more than 800 victims?

Twisted evil PNV president Xabier Arzalluz accused the PP of having, you guessed it, a conspiracy in mind. Seems that what they want to do is not close down a newspaper spewing ETA propaganda and operating as an ETA front, which is illegal in Spain. Spewing ETA propaganda, that is. (Note: the same thing would be illegal in the US. If somebody was putting out the Osama Daily News in the US, I guarantee they'd use something, probably the RICO law, to nail the bastards.) No, their sinister plot is to cause so much social disturbance that the next regional elections will have to be suspended. Yeah, right. Dirtbag ETA cop-killer Mikel Otegi and another ETA member have been busted by the French police. Otegi had been acquitted back in 1995 of the double murder of two Ertzaintzas (regional cops) whom he shot with his shotgun. No question about that. A jury let him off, though, because he was drunk and therefore not in control of his actions. Yep. They really did. He took off before they could find something else to arrest him for; now they want to retry him for that double murder on the grounds that a jury was improcedural for a case of terrorism, which should be heard before the Audiencia Nacional.

There's a Naomi Klein full-page op-ed in today's Vangua. Seems we're trying to overthrow democratically-elected Hugo Chávez in Venezuela and we're manipulating the Venezuelan media so we can get the oil. Very unimaginative, Naomi. There are much, much more creative conspiracy theories out there.

At the Césars, the French Oscars, Pedro Almodóvar won best European film. In his speech, he said, "I'm proud to be European in a European country where I don't have to speak out against the war, because its president already has." Gee, Pedro, since you're so happy to be in such a country, why don't you stay home from the Academy Awards in protest? Since the Oscar is manifestly not an award given out by unbiased judges, I don't see why they shouldn't bias their votes against Mr. Poofy Hair. I would if I had a vote. The guy looks like a goddamn mushroom with that pile of brush sticking up off the top of his fat face. Michael Moore also missed a good chance to shut up. In fact, he gets a coveted Iberian Notes Oscar, named after Oscar, my cat, who bites my hands--the hands that feed him--for saying, "I'm part of a majority of Americans who didn't vote for Bush, are therefore the victims of a coup d'etat, and want peace." Coup d'etat, huh, Mickey? So you're calling your country undemocratic and its government illegitimate? Them's pretty strong words, there.

People Who Infuriate Me So Much I'd Like to Stomp Their Faces In:

Michael Moore. Al Franken. Chevy Chase. That's about it. See, I'm calming down. The pills are kicking in. Oh, yeah, Martin Short, just because I hate his guts. And Pee-Wee Herman, on general principles. Give me a shot at only one and I'll pick Chevy Chase. Remember when Bruce Willis goes back and saves his hated and feared enemy, Marcellus Wallace, from the murderous redneck rapists? I'd like to think that I'd be brave enough to similarly step in for someone in that position, anyone at all. Except for Chevy Chase. Hell, I'd demand a chance to take my turn if I had that kind of shot at Chevy Chase.

The International Brigadists in Baghdad are coming home, split. They were given the Saddam tour of Baghdad, which some called "deplorable and pathetic" and seem to have figured out that, as one asks himself, "Is being against the intervention in Iraq being in favor of the regime?" Others responded that Iraq was under "foreign military oppression" and that those with questioning minds "didn't understand anything". Says one pacifist, "There's an abyss between us" and "(Future human shields) should decide now what their line will be in this city of palaces and poverty." Sounds like at least some of the Brigadists have a brain in there somewhere.