Top five recent Google search hits from my referrals log:

5. is alfonso guerra gay

Far as I know, he's not; he's widely rumored to have a mistress.

4. sexy asses of Utah

Try the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. Or Marie Osmond. Or Donny, if you're an alternative-lifestyle guy.

3. nude cyclists

Sounds good to me, but wouldn't you get tremendous road rash if you took a spill? And wouldn't your, uh, apparatus flap around in the breeze?

2. sex shops pozuelo

Can't help you there; never been in Pozuelo. I do know there's one on Aragon near Balmes here in Barcelona.

1. where to buy heroin Barcelona

Try Can Tunis, but if you get stabbed it's not my fault.